Adventures in Bunny Sitting



Posted: Monday, January 11, 2010

by Janet Schick

There was a time, when I was in my mid-thirties or so, when I must have considered myself to be the Joan of Arc for the animal kingdom. No stray was too bedraggled and smelly for me to embrace. No four legged creature was going to be abandoned, mistreated, or spoken crossly to while I was around. And while I still believe in those principles, and try to live by them whenever I can, I realize that I have to be on guard against arrogant tendencies. Maybe I don't ALWAYS know what is best for everybody and everything. Or maybe I sometimes just jump in over my head. That was the case when I first came across the bunny I began to call "Mr. B"

Mr. B belonged to a neighboring family who kept him penned up in a bunny hutch. The hutch was in an open area behind the neighbors' house., but I never noticed anyone paying attention to him at all. In fact, most of the time ,when I would go over to visit Mr. B, his water bottle was empty and his food was getting low. So I started carrying water and lettuce and carrots for him whenever I visited. Soon, I really felt that Mr. B and I were bonding. I mean, how could he have failed to notice that if it wasn't for my TLC, he'd be bunny skin and bones? Flea-bitten, friendless, forgotten (not to mention very thirsty)--but you get the drift.

So finally one day I phoned the neighbor, and very gently suggested that if SHE had no interest in making her bunny's life a Utopia, I would be happy to step in and do it for her. She readily agreed.

Off we went, my three children and I, to deliver Mr. B from the Gates of Hell as he knew them. I could almost hear the Heavenly Hosts chanting my name. I was a GOOD PERSON.

Unfortunately, I was also completely clueless about owning a bunny, mistreated or otherwise. I had never owned a bunny, had never known anyone who had owned a bunny (except for the aforementioned Mean Neighbors) and didn't know the first thing about bunny psychology. (Yes, bunnies do have psychology, I'm pretty sure). And truth be told, Mr. B could just as easily have been a MS. B--how the heck would I know? He never let me get close enough to check, if you know what I mean.

So here we were, Mr. B and his new adoptive family. The first order of business, we decided, was to get him out of that horrible bunny hutch and let him Roam Free Amongst the Flowers. We were witnesses to his first taste of Bunny Freedom, hallelujah! Two and a half hours later, as the sun was beginning to set, he was still tasting freedom and we were getting pretty tired of chasing him amongst the flowers.

Finally, someone got the bright idea to throw a tarp over him and bring him into the house. There was no way he was going to spend his first night with his new family alone in the bunny hutch, after all. That was when we realized that bunnies love to chew through live electrical cords. And that, having chewed through live electrical cords, they are able to hop away and make a big mess on the rug.

Mr. B's first night in his new home passed uneventully after that. And after a few days, I got used to picking up little brown nuggets from one end of the house to the other. I got used to not having functioning electrical appliances, though I did miss my electric blanket for quite a while.

I was determined to let him get outside exercise, though. In a yard with no fence, that posed a bit of a challenge.

Being dog owners, we had a wire strung between two trees with a leash attatched to they could roam around the yard a little. It was a simple thing to buy a small cat collar for Mr. B, hook him up to the dog run, and let him cavort his little furry heart out. At least, that was the plan.

Mr. B, unfortunately, had other ideas. And that was his undoing. He managed to slip out of the cat collar in the first five minutes, and make a beeline for the wide open spaces. Never to be seen again. By anyone. Vanished into thin air, poof! Gone! Buh-bye, Mr. B!

Don't misunderstand me, I feel very badly about my experiences as a bunny owner. I looked all over creation for him, for a long time. But I did learn a valuable lesson about pet ownership. Don't let self-righteous hubris dominate your desire to help a small living creature.

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Top-level comments on this article: (3 total)
» left by Jack
from PA 2 years 130 days ago.
Nice, cute, well written. I wish good luck with your pets.
» left by Tonya Bond
 2 years 130 days ago.
4 fans.
That was hilarious. I have my own bunny horror stories so I can totally relate. Thanks for the laugh. Sorry about your Mr. B though. Welcome to SearchWarp.
» left by Janet Schick from PA 2 years 130 days ago.
Thanks for the kind words, Tonya!
» left by Anonymous
 2 years 128 days ago.
Thanks for the "tail". I had a pet bunny too one time.
» left by Janet Schick 2 years 127 days ago.
11 fans.
I hope your experience turned out better than mine did! Thanks for the comment.
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